January 07, 2006

Bloodrayne reviewed, stars defend

Bloodrayne-Loken.jpgI just caught a review of Bloodrayne and it's bad, very bad. I mean the review is good but the movie sounds awful. At the same time we're hearing one of the stars involved attempting to defend it and Uwe Boll to the very end.

First up we have the words of some of the stars from VH1:

"I totally do want to validate Uwe Boll in the pantheon of the horror genre," - Billy Zane

"We know that over time the work will speak for itself...With that being said, he's a great guy and I'd be happy to continue working for him." - Kristanna Loken

Neither sounds particularly positive, but then Zane goes all out.

"He has totally made his mark and put his naysayers and critics to rest with this film...The guy's a maverick; the way he directs, the way he funds his own movies, the way he distributed his film ... love him or hate him, he's a true individual, and I dig the guy."..."You're looking at 'Lord of the Rings' on acid. It's massive, and epic, and really twisted."..."It doesn't apologize or go [politically correct]; it's a splatter-fest. You need a raincoat when you go see this movie. ... I've heard responses on the Web with people saying 'It's about time. No studio would ever do that!' "

Which sites would those be? It sounds like the high-end actor Zane is really intense on this movie...but Lord of the Rings on Acid...perhaps the audience have to be, or wearing raincoats to avoid the flood of tears at wasting time and money on the movie!

Checking out one of the first reviews I've seen over at FilmFodder I'd side against Zane on that one.

...the film is a giant smear of characters and plots...It's strange to watch Boll continually stage sequences he has no idea how to capture properly...Boll is terrible with action, making the battle choreography found in the film feel as motivated as the mid-day entertainment at the local renaissance festival, and then he cuts the material to ribbons to cover up his mistakes..."BloodRayne" is a visual joke...a string of cameos by actors who just wanted a free Romanian vacation...and give increasingly deplorable performances.

That enough for you? Has anyone actually ventured to go see this?


Posted by at January 7, 2006 07:34 PM


Comments

Can’t say I am overly surprised; the trailer had me never ever wanting to see this film, which is pretty impressive seeing as trailers are supposed to do the opposite. I really hope Uwe Boll never makes another film. Out of the last 10 movies he has made 3 of them are in the IMDB bottom 100 list, does that not say anything to the guy? Do box office takings, critics reviews and the general publics view of his work mean nothing to him.

I can agree with Zane though with the fact that Boll is “a true individual” anyone else in their right mind would have packed his job in years ago.

Do you think there is any way WE can stop him from making any other films? :p

Posted by: Sam at January 7, 2006 08:06 PM

Like I said last month, I'm sure they are right in saying Mr. Boll is a nice guy and easy to work with. There is however, one small problem. It isn't just mainstream film critics who despise the final cut of Boll's films. It is the public at large.

I think I know what really happened. Guinevere Turner, who wrote the script, penned "American Psycho," cable's "The L Word" and the indie hit "Go Fish". I think it is highly posiible the script was fairly decent and Boll took over, turned it into mush. Some actors may have also signed on before Boll walked on. Some actors do want to work with other actors they like from time to time. Nothing new there.

Also, there's that odd way that Boll casts. Bring in an actor for a day or two here, there, rest of the cast having less than a month of prep time...

As for those 'fan quotes' Billy Zane mentioned, I tried, I couldn't find them.
Perhaps those were the fans of Demon Knight, Phantom and Dead Calm.

Who knows for sure.

Posted by: darren seeley at January 7, 2006 08:54 PM

Being the masochist that I am, I went to see this cluster f**k today and can attest that, yes, Uwe Boll has again desecrateded another fine video game franchise. You can read my review here:

http://metalogical.blogspot.com/

The only bright spot is that if producers continue to give this idiot money then there's hope that indies can cash in on films that are equally as bad. Aim low, my young padawan.

Posted by: Bruce at January 8, 2006 03:50 AM

what a shock?!? A bad movie!! LOL, I really dont care about bloodrayne, but Dungeon Siege is another story. I like that game. I am actually playing it at the moment(yes, the first one, the second is still to expensive for me), and the trailer already sucks. Well, at least Halo is safe from his grasp.

Posted by: igl at January 8, 2006 05:29 AM

The "free Romanian vacation" line had me laughing. I went to a screening of Man with the Screaming Brain that Bruce Campbell hosted in San Francisco a few months ago and he had a lot of interesting comments about working in Bulgaria. It sounded like about the least appealing place to do a lengthy location shoot that I'd ever heard described in any detail. Hey, maybe Romania is a better place to shoot, but I have a sneaking suspicion that it's a half-star better at best. ;-)

Posted by: R. Jackson at January 8, 2006 07:28 AM

I laughed when flipping through a gaming magazine and seeing a promo for this movie for the first time. Whenever I hear of another game made into movie, the movie will more than likely suck. The only good video game made into a movie that has been good is the FIRST Resident Evil, and even that is not saying much.

And Kristana Loken doesn't look that hot in it. Back when Doom came out in theatres my friends were trying everything possible to get me into see it, I would insist no and go off on my own. They got back to me and agreed the movie sucked, I didn't even have to see it to know that it sucked. Just like I don't have to see Bloodrayne to know it sucks.

Until we get a gaming movie that does what X-Men and Spider-Man did for the comic book movies comes out, i'm staying away. Metroid, Halo, Metal Gear Solid, are three that come to mind as having the greatest possible stories and greatest look on the big screen if done correctly, and sadly they will more than likely sucka s well; but I will waste my time and money in the theatre for those three....maybe..

Posted by: lizardfreak12 at January 8, 2006 11:26 AM

When did Zane become a high-end actor?

Posted by: chark hammis at January 9, 2006 12:53 PM

Chark, it's called sarcasm. SOmething us British have in plentiful supply.

Posted by: Richard Brunton at January 9, 2006 01:56 PM