Holy Crap These G.I. Joe Clips Look Like SHIT!
Posted by John Campeaon 22. 07. 2009in News Chat
My jaw is on the floor. There is this new clip out for the upcoming G.I. Joe movie, and I’m completely in awe of how terrible the visual effects look. No seriously… they look like half assed video game cut scenes.
Just look at how bad and animated the characters look. And right at the beginning of the clip watch the character’s “face” when he says “I don’t have them. Where are they”? It looks SOOOOO fake. It’s so animated you might as well slap Roger Rabbit in the scene. Check it out:
The real shame is that the scene looks like it might have been a half decent action sequence, but the effects are so bad I can’t get around it. Anyone have any hope left? I still have a little… not much… next to none… but a small glimmer.
bad. like bad bad. like reeeeeaaaaaal bad
I guess I fail to see why. Structurally, it doesn’t seem like a bad scene. A little cheesy, but it’s so easy to tell that that was on purpose. Come on, this is G.I. Joe.
Most videogames don’t have nearly as detailed and genuinely real-looking CGI as in this clip. Much less that of some “half-assed cutscene”. If anything, this clip has further persuaded me to be open to this movie, as I can better see that this story has a spirit and soul of it’s own. Looks fun. May end up stupid, but looks fun all the same at this point.
And really, in terms of action and structure, I’ve seen way worse clips than this.
That was awful, 1 minute 24 seconds I’ll never get back. Hey John, in your theater when the trailer shown in front of Transformers did anyone clap? My theater was dead silent
No one clapped at mine. Just some whispers and chuckles.
Aaron
My whole group clapped because were huge fans. As soon as we saw the paramount pictures stars fly accross the screen we all cheered, we knew it was GI JOE (fucking nerds lol)
And in IMAX they only show 1 trailer, and it was HP6, so they skipped the GO JOE one, and my gf said
“no gi joe trailer? thats pretty lame”
We all wanted to see it in IMAX. Fuck.
But apart from us no one seemed to care xD
Lol cool. Same with mine, even the kids did nothing-lol this will bomb
No one clapped at ours someone larthed when the effel tower clasped and that was the only ressonce and that also looked horrible btw
My theater got a big applause for the GI JOE trailer when i saw Star Trek, I was looking around at them and i was thinking “Whats wrong with you people!?”
this scene was worse than all of the wolverine bootleg version. thats actually what it reminds me of, and unfinished copy. makes me sad/sick that it looks that bad.
Really? Doesn’t look THAT bad imo. Sure, I’d agree that the beginning bit sucked, but the rest looked pretty solid.
lol i have see worst, is no that bad…
“Mmmmmm, 64 slices of American cheese”
That’s what this film is going to be but at least you can actually see what’s going on in the action scenes.
Hey Phil,
Yeah, you can see the action. The DIRECTION of the action scene really isn’t bad at all… but it LOOKS just terrible.
Do you know who is handling the vfx for it?
Seriously John, I think you have a Transformers bias. Some of the first TF movie stuff was about that bad, just remember it’s not real life it’s the movies…Eat your popcorn and enjoy the spectacle…
Hey BobbaFett,
You said:
I think you have a Transformers bias. Some of the first TF movie stuff was about that bad
First of all dude… did you read my review of the latest Transformers movie?
Secondly… you think Transformers VFX looked BAD?!?!?! Are you insane?!?! You’re totally entitled to that opinion… but… wow.
John,
I didn’t say ALL of it looked bad, just some of it. One point that comes to mind in the “Nokia in a box”. I was also talking about the first TF movie.
Also, I’m NOT saying this looked good, looks like some programmer smoked a bowl and then went way to deep with the Havok engine…
It’s going to look worse on the screen specially if it’s not a digital projection. Having said that, these effects are much better than the crappy CG Rock he had in the second Mummy movie.
I don’t know, Harry Knowles says it’s “crazy cool.”
Harry (God bless him) also said Phantom Menace was awesome and that the latest Indiana Jones movie was fantastic… so take it all with a grain of salt.
I say it looks like shit… you should take that with a grain of salt too and just make up your own mind.
Lol, I was being sarcastic. Harry also likes Van Helsing. I agree that Joe looks awful. I won’t be seeing it (like I didn’t see T2). I’m holding out for District 9, which looks awesome.
Considering you gave Harry Potter the same grade as Transformers, I’d say you have a Transformers bias too. Just saying.
Hey ElZilcho,
So giving a movie a 5 out of 10 means I have a BIAS for it? Yeah… ok. It must be nice to be able to change the meaning of things at will to best suit whatever you want to say.
Put some ketchup and mustard on it and Harry will love the piece of shit.
Harry also liked the 1998 “Godzilla”, and every other terrible over-the-top cheezy assed special effects movie
Well if he liked the Godzilla remake then all of his crediblity just went away.
Yeah, well, Knowles could still be telling the truth. Just because it’s “crazy cool” doesn’t mean it isn’t also so structurally flawed it borders on unwatchable.
@ John
What I meant by that was if you think Transformers 2 was on par with Harry Potter, then you’ve got a Transformers bias.
I actualy thought the movie looked real cool and the only reason I really thought bad of it was because of your words.
Then i saw the trailer for GI Joe before Harry Potter and that’s when I they started talking. Then it started to look like shit.
But that guy talking was also really bad too.
That’s what I was thinking. The acting was just awful.
The effects was pretty bad as well,and if I can that on a little Asus netbook, then you know it’s very obvious
This version looks a LOT better.
I think it looks awesome
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RziPkSWPWrs&feature=related
Yeah, that’s pretty darn cool.
I’ve seen worse. I think this will be fun.
I dunno what in the world you’re talking about. The effects look fine. Maybe not the best ever but definitely not as bad as you’re making them seem.
wolverine had worse effects.
Totally. So did Iron Man, in parts.
…rather enjoyed that.
I have absolutely the lowest expectations for this movie, and that clip posibly lowered them, I hadn’t heard that Snake Eyes had a mouth in his costume, his character is MUTE why does his uniform have a mouth???
I don’t often agree with John, but the special effects in that scene are almost comically bad. I realize it is hard to simulate human movement, but they didn’t even get perspective right. When Duke falls off the truck and gets up, him and Shawn Wayan’s character (Ripcord?) look like midgets. When Snake Eyes rolls out of the truck he is a good 3 inches off the ground. The truck getting “hit” by the train looks like it takes off a good second before the train hits it. And the suits at the end looks just horrid, as the car breaks before their bodies land.
The trailer could have been good, but after watching good CGI all summer this looks terribly amateur.
OH YEAH!
I was wanting to ask that!
So is that like- his face? Or is it his mask??? I dont get it either man
Ray Park is the only reason im watching this movie…him and Ryan Reynolds always get the best fucking movie characters EVER
Also the Good guys faces are exposed (nitpick here), shouldn’t there faces be slashed up.
I do have hope for this film to join in my Ed Wood hall of fame. SOOOOOO BAAAD. It becomes comically good.
yea that makes no sense at all…doint know why they didnt just keep the ninja mask…makes no sense.
Chris
The faceless mask had to change, like most things
But snake eyes should had stayed JUST the way hes always been, i mean hes 100% black, theres no way to fuck him up…unless of course you put lips on his ninja mask…god…
First lips on Optimus and now Snake-Eyes, stop the madness!
lol
I didn’t see Hazmat’s post before I posted, Is the clip Hazmat posted a finished clip and John’s clip in process? The clip from Hazmat’s post actually looks well done. I HOPE that is the case.
They both are, watch both of them closely and youll see that they edited both.
We cant know for sure until the movie comes out.
But the one with Snake Eyes summersaulting twice over cars is fucking amazing.
No- i get it now.
Johns is perfectly fine. The one i posted was edited so the Baroness says “He gave up” and storm shadow says “He never gives up” those lines where originally from Johns post
The video i posted happened before the one John did, in between those 2 videos Snake eyes somehow got under the black Hummer.
will there be a review to justify giving this movie a lot of bad press for the few months or so?
I wasn’t aware I had to “justify” my opinion about something.
This looks like shit… so i say it looks like shit.
If the movie is good, I’ll say it’s good. I did that with TMNT, and I’ll do it with G.I. Joe if it’s warranted.
John,
It’s your blog brother, we respect your opinion. Opinions however, are subjective…
In my mind GI Joe has a lot of potential, but it seems to a bit wasted on CGI effects vs characters and story, which to me was a bout 50% of GI Joe…
what I was deferring to was that there have been movies in the past (i.e. the spirit) which have been bad mouthed from the beginning and a review never materialized. It’s your blog, but I doubt you’d appreciate YOUR movie been bad mouthed before it came out and not a word said on the FINAL product. I’m not saying your review should swing one way or another, your opinion, I’m just saying there should be a review when the movie comes out.
Back on topic, CGI is over rated. We all know Avatar is going to even make ROTF look like GI Joe when it comes out.
Why do Sommers’ movies (with the exception of Deep Rising and the first Mummy) always have shitty VFX? Even Van Helsing had some of the shittiest VFX I’ve ever seen. The VFX in this clip are so goddamn horrible. The film’s only saving grace may be that at least it might be fun.
While I liked the pace of Deep Rising, I could not disagree more Sound Designer Dan. The FX in that movie were crap. Perhaps you meant to say Jungle Book?
ive always wondered that myself, i think his films would be a lot more tolerable if the VFX had an upgrade
I think by now most of us are in agreement that this film is probably going to suck ass, having said that I watched that clip and didn’t really mind what I saw…I’ve seen some pretty dire effects in my time but I don’t think its the effects in films that are going to kill it. Its gonna be the story…or lack thereof.
Stephen Chow’s Shaolin Soccer had pretty basic effects but the story was fantastic. In fact I remember thinking the first Spiderman film looked pretty shit in certain scenes, especially when he climbs the wall in his makeshift spidey costume…
Yeah, I remember feeling the same way.
but at least it’s not as bad as transformers 2 and wolverine
Could it possibly be? After all, Peter Travers said he thought TF2 had a shot at the worst film of the decade nomination.
It’s kinda how I look at the new Ghost Riders sequel coming out: there’s no possible way it can be as terrible as the first. Therein lies my sense of optimism. :)
Having said that, I’m going to be really depressed when/if this film sucks.
hey i thought that was rather cool…call me jaded but i liked actually being able to see everything that was going, no pointless extreme closeups, to fast edits…i liked it
Couple of comments to this - If the movie doesnt look fake with all the jumps and fast running threw trains , all of the crew thats played those scenes were dead - really fucked up dead.
It always fun to see flying cars in the ear and big explosions , but Stephen Summers also said - dont expect a good story movie but a load of action for 2 hours straight.
Yhea the movie doenst look great at all but by that i still want to see the movie - Because of how bad it is. Thats why this movie is going to make money , i think everybody wants to see how bad it is.
It doesn’t look that bad, but it doesn’t look REAL, enough, that kind of took me out of the scene, but I must say i am a little interested in seeing what sommers did. I like the mummy movies (1&2), van helsing not so much, the ideas/concepts were strong, but shit happens. I’ll give this a shot on a saturday/sunday morning for $6.00.
Yuck, the explosion after the collision with the train looked awful too
why do they need the robot suits again???
why is there a mouth piece on snake eyes mask????
Why has the producer and director now been hunted down and killed yet????
“Why has the producer and director now been hunted down and killed yet????”
B/c that would be murder.
well they murdered GI Joe first
Isn’t this supposed to follow the sigma 6 version more closely than the 80′s version? Isn’t that were the suits came from? I never watched it myself, it just wasn’t appealing.
It’s not that they look bad (which, they absolutely do) but everything looks ENTIRELY fake. The physics weren’t even right on half the stuff.
I have no interest in seeing this movie. Ever. (I probably will though, because I know I’ll be bored enough one day to watch it…someday).
most of Stephen Summer’s movies have bad cgi in it. I think he plans it that way. Look at all the cheesy cgi in The Mummy 1+2, Van Helsing, and Deep Rising.
The acting is bad too. “He never gives up”, the “Wah! Coming through!” and the “I don’t have them, where are they?!” Wow. Horrible.
They’d be good ringtones though maybe.
“He never gives up” is a line from the cartoon. It is part of the theme song. Can’t believe no one pointed this out yet.
It looks bad..and dumb, but for some reason those cheesy lines and outside-the-laws-of physics action sequences almost feel like the cartoon. Sigh.
To be honest, this is exactly what I expected, and I have the feeling that I will enjoy this film. From what I’m hearing thoguh, someone who’s read the book, the suits are only in 2 scenes. Not really spoiling anything there, just making it known.
It didn’t look that bad. Harry, the main guy at aintitcoolnews actually liked it. I think everyone has low expectations and might actually be suprised.
Oh well… the show (classic) was a cartoon so maybe they want that cartoon look. LOL
I personally only think the first part with the face looked bad, the rest didnt look that bad to me.
there is nothing in that clip that is as bad as wolverines claws in origins
really,how bad can this be as a total package???i’ve seen bad effects in good movies before and has anyone gone back and watched the original cartoon again.i’ve been watching a couple episodes a day and got ta tell ya….bad.shipwreck and snake eyes need to distract some cobra officers at a concert…what’s a joe to do….i know,have snake eyes break dance.look at the source material a little closer and some of these nit pics on how some characters look and shit seem pointless.snakes eyes has a mask with a mouth…the guys mute,not void of a mouth,optimus has a mouth too….would you have really prefered a giant bose speaker in place of it??? i say fuck it,movie going to be a good time killer and bring on serpentor and firefly in the sequel
This looks like a fun dumb summer movie - exactly what I’m paying 6 bucks for.
this is why i dont like sommers on anything he directs, cept for the first mummy. it’s always a mix, he may get a few things right here and there, but he also gets a few things really wrong here and there, but at the end, the bad side of it really shows and it just ruins the whole experience of watching the movie. i didn’t know Snake Eyes has a mouth…. WTF?? it’s definite for me, i wont be watching this on the big screen.
also, i think tatum delivers his lines really poorly and bad, i mean even his voice tone sounds lame, i mean this is DUke we are talking about, and he says it like some new kid on the block. theres no presence and charismatic appeal about him. hes just..lame.
Horrible.
Crapfest-ola.
It will make 100 mil easy.
(sure it will have an 85% drop the following week, but who will notice?)
P.S. the int’l friends think I’m joking. Go ahead, think that. But since it’s August and there’s not much going against it except for Perfect Getaway.
Also, people now decide what movie they will see on the fly, hogging up ticket lines. I can see it now
“GI Joe looks dumb”
“All the more reason to see it! Sienna’s Catsuit DUDE!”
Meanwhile, Milla Jovovich gets wet and nobody notices :(
I say 80 mil
Dude perfect getaway is only in my “to watch” list because i want to see if Thor can act
Perfect Getaway looks good but ehh to me. I can see a big opening for GI Joe but I think it’ll bomb opening weekend
*shudders* A truly cringe-worthy clip if I’ve ever seen one..
I really expected the worst thing ever. But alas…everyone here just jumps on the band wagon and overreacts. Yes its cheesy, its certainly not an Oscar winner. I yes its looks fake, but so does every movie with cgi. Its doesn’t look half as bad as everyone makes it sound.
Looked okay to me.
Crap Crap Crappity crap crap. I agree with john on all levels and oh did I know this movie is going to be crap? The effects are so kiddy, god the original TV show looks better than this shit
On what level?
Good lord that was horrible….I had some hope left, but now I think its gonna be a pass.
Ouch, this looks bad.
was that just cgi porn?
Agreed, the first Spider-Man had better FX then this and that was years ago.
But what really got me was the BAD acting, Duke’s badly dubbed grunts after he got hit by the car, least I guess that was Duke, and that other then seeing Snake Eyes, it didn’t feel anything like G.I. Joe at all.
Which sucks cuz I can maybe see myself renting this movie and not thinking of it as a G.I. Joe movie, and maybe threw that I can enjoy it as a mindless popcorn action flick. But they did so well on Snake Eyes’ look, that it’s going to be hard seeing him and not being reminded that it is suppose to be a G.I. Joe movie…
I already can tell that this is going to be a movie that’s going to be entertaining enough to see it at home but not good enough to make a movie night out of it. I think that the action sequences are not so bad actually. I think the acting is whats going to kill this movie.
I’d say its more general than this and applies to nearly every new SFX film I see… the special effects look less and less convincing.
Maybe we’re just more used to seeing this sort of effect, so its become easier to spot? The effects in a lot of older films still hold up spectacularly. Terminator 2. Jurassic Park.
But others I rewatch which seemed amazing at the time (The Matrix), now look fairly horrible upon subsequent viewings.
Maybe the less you care about a movie the less you’re going to be convinced by the effects?
Who knows.
Regardless, I’d say the effects in this look pretty standard to me. Definately no worse than say, Spiderman 2.
I think the effects in movies, very soon, are going to come to a point where they use so much it kills the enjoyment and makes it look too fake. I don’t think that’s too far off
John, I love you. All I had to do was read the post title and I was howling laughing.
That scene looks fine. What exactly looks fake about it? They’re wearing their accelerator suits which allow them to jump and move faster and stronger. In terms of effects, it looks fine. No different from plenty of other films.
I think this will be a fun action film.
Meh it looks ok, with so many movies using visually effects I would say this is average effects. Does have a little campiness to the clip the one thing I hated is that Roadblock has a british accent? Dude what the hell is up with that?
This clip makes me like it even more! You think it looks cartoony John. Well, it was a cartoon and comic book before a LAM… so, I have to say it works well for me. I kinda can’t wait to see it now. I actually like the way it looks. It’s very Stephen Sommers. I Love the first Mummy and even really enjoy the other Mummy’s… the only problem I have with Sommers is Van Helsing.
Looked good to me.
dont know wtf yall are talking about, it was a good watch to me.
This movie looks terrible.
I still want to see it.
The effects look terrible. As John said, it’s not the actual sequence that is necessarily that bad it’s the execution of the special effects. Special effects are at least party rated on how real it looks. On that basis the job on this is extremely poor. It’s not smooth, it looks completely fake and there does not appear to be any attention to detail at all. I’m surprised I can’t see the wire holding the guys as they bounce off the cars.
If you hadn’t pointed out the odd face at the beginning I probably wouldn’t have noticed because of the movement going on. I think it looks cool and still can’t wait to see the movie. As happens a lot with these things, the VFX may not be 100% complete yet. Either way, I’m excited for it.
WHAT THE FUCK? WHY DO THE GI JOES HAVE SUPER SUITS? WHY DO THEY LOOK LIKE MASTER CHIEF? WHO WROTE THIS DAMN MOVIE? GI Joes are soldiers who are bad ass because they regular heroes without special shit. This movie is gonna blow ass.
If it wasn’t in the title, I’d never know this was a film about G.I. Joe. I’d rather see the old cartoon movie at this point.
i think i’m gonna be sick. lines… sooo bad.
I find it funny that you guys are bitching about the vfx from a low res, highly compressed, YouTube clip. Everyone’s an armchair vfx critic.
hey john am i right in thinking dat dude in the black suit is that guy who played toad from xmen and darth maul ( the only good thing about star wars ep 1 )
I just want to see the parts with Ray Park.