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Teen Horniness Is Not A Crime

By Rodney - November 29, 2007 - 11:27 America/Montreal

Sarah Michelle Gellar has laid down some lyrics for the upcoming Southland Tales soundtrack. The name of the glorious song is “Teen Horniness Is Not A Crime”. We get the following news of this legendary song from the WEBMASTER at Filmjunk:

In the movie, Sarah Michelle Gellar’s character is a porn star who records a Britney Spears-esque pop song called “Teen Horniness is Not a Crime”. The song is included on the Southland Tales soundtrack, and will supposedly be released as an actual radio single.

Zeon’s Music Blog has a link to the MP3, so head over there and check it out, then laugh at such inane lyrics as “An overcrowded nation / leads to sex frustration / all your legislation / can’t stop teen’s masturbation”. Brilliant or moronic? You decide.

The WEBMASTER gets a lot of quality leads and this is another to add to the list. Please do yourself a favor and listen to this ridiculous song. It sucks as much as any other pop song, but at least it makes you smile. This song will surely become a rally cry for promiscuous teens across the globe, which is awesome - because sluts love to sing!

I have yet to see Southland Tales. It has had some festival showings and looks like it has had a limited release, but to my knowledge it is not playing anywhere near my abode. Sarah Michelle Gellar as a porn-star could be awesome, and this song has caused interest in the project to well up inside of me. International friends, have any of you seen the movie, and if so what did you think?

» 11 Comments

  1. Kristina says:

    Doug, I’ve seen it. It is SHIT. Absolutely horrible. You can read my review here:

    http://www.stalepopcorn.co.uk/movie-reviews-theatrical/movie-review-southland-tales/

    But her song is a funny moment in the flick, I’ll give them that.

  2. LizardFreak says:

    hmmm…

  3. Fearhurst says:

    That was the worst piece of shit I’ve ever heard.

  4. DarkKinger says:

    Watch it, Doug! WATCH THE MOVIE! We need your video review to guide us into the light!

    Plus, based on many reviews, your Southland Tales review could get rated XXX, lol!

  5. WolfMarauder says:

    Southland Tales is reminiscent of films like The Apple or Zardoz. It is a movie that has absolutely no care at all for whether or not it makes sense, and it is more of an experiment in pop art than it is a movie. Try it out if you want to see something new, but this is a movie that basically transcends everything you think movies are. Because of the original sin attatched to this kind of piece, it really was impossible for Southland Tales to be entertaining in a standard way. I did not care for about 75% of the movie, but the 25% I did enjoy was incredibly funny and incredibly fascinating. You could say that Southland Tales is brilliant, but that doesn’t make it good.

  6. RustyJames says:

    Man, they’re screwing you Canadians on this one. Don’t worry Doug this will give you plenty of time to read all the prerequisite comic books.

    here’s my review:
    http://destroyallfilms.com/2007/11/20/70/

  7. corey says:

    I Have Seen It too And It Is The Best Film I Have Seen All Year. Its a film you have to see a few times to get use to it, but I thought the film was AMAZING!!!!!!!

  8. RustyJames says:

    Have you really sat through this movie several times?

  9. bassturd says:

    wrong corey. No Country for Old Men = best film of the year!

  10. Corey says:

    To Me as far as right now its the best film of the year in my eyes, yes i’ve seen it twice and i’m seeing it again this weekend. I have yet to see NCFOM but I will be sure to see it this weekend.

  11. Southland Tales is the movie of the year!
    I have seen it three times now. Masterpiece.

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