It looks like our favorite Movie Blog party girl has gotten herself into more trouble again. Lohan has let loose the fabled party wolf and is unable to contain it. We get the following information from the caves of Yahoo:

Lohan, 20, and two other people were in her 2005 Mercedes SL-65 when it crashed on Sunset Boulevard around 5:30 a.m., Sgt. Mike Foxen said. It appeared the actress was speeding, Lt. Mitch McCann said at an afternoon news conference.

Officers at the scene found a “usable amount” of a drug tentatively identified as cocaine, McCann said. He declined to say where the drug was found other than to say Lohan was not carrying it.

I said it before when Paris got busted and I will say it now - If you have the cash, hire a driver. Having a paid, sober driver to cart you around will save you a tremendous amount of headaches in the long run. It looks like she will not get pinched with the cocaine, but someone in the car still might. I am starting to wonder why young Hollywood just doesn’t have house parties. You can party like the devil at your house, do a bathtub full of cocaine and avoid all DUI charges.

The police are on the roads, there are tons of cops in Hollywood… so avoid the roads if you are in party wolf form. When I was there it seemed every time I looked around there was a cop. In a place like that, your chances of getting pulled over are very high. Knowing this, and already having a DUI charge makes me wonder why Lohan would risk it again. Mind you, when you have a head full of booze and coke, quality life decisions become harder to make.

Michael Cera (Arrested Development) is featured in a leaked video online as the original “Ben Stone” played by Seth Rogen in Knocked up. It looks like this might just be a screen test, but the story attached to it online is that Cera was the first pick for this role, and it was later dished out to Rogen after this happened:

Yeah, it’s likely staged just to generate some buzz, but if it was real then this would already be all over the tabloids and gossip sites. So far I have only seen the clip at a viral video site called Funny or Die.com

However, I am looking forward to Rogen and Heigl in this.

New Megatron Poster (Thanks Ty)

For those of you that are interested in the National Treasure series of films the trailer has become available.
I am not excited to see this film, but with Mirren and Keitel on board the cast is rounding out to be great.
I present for you the trailer, because I am courteous. Please enjoy yourselves!

The guys at comingsoon.net were nice enough to let us know about about the second ending after the credits of Pirates 3. I just came back from Pirates and will talk about it tonight on the show as well as the Monday round table. I will let you know here and now that it isn’t worth admission, but if you do go - wait until the end of the credits so you maximize your disappointment for your money.

Cheers Nick for the heads up! For those of you that have not seen the video yet - here it is!
I told you this was a role that suited her perfectly.

Saddening news for fans of organized crime and Nick Cage. It appears due to scheduling conflicts, Cage will not be able to star as Capone. We get the skinny from comingsoon.net:

If Brian De Palma moves ahead with prequel The Untouchables: Capone Rising, it will be sans Nicolas Cage, reports Variety. Cage had been in negotiations to star in the follow-up, but talks have ended because of scheduling issues, according to his representatives.

It was announced last week that Gerard Butler has joined the cast as Jimmy Malone, played by Sean Connery in the original. Cage would have played the young Al Capone.

I am not happy about this. I was pumped and curious to see what a young Al Capone as played by Nick Cage would look like. Now we will never know. Gerard Butler still has his hat in the ring which is cool, but it was Cage that I was looking forward to seeing.

I do not mind gangster movies if they are done well, I loved Untouchables and did not half mind the tv show. I do not think this movie needed a prequel but was suspending judgment because I wanted to see Cage as Capone. Now that he is gone I will have to re evaluate my feelings.

Let me ask of all of you; who would you now like to see play Al Capone in place of Cage?

When asked about the possibility of doing a cameo in an A-Team film, Mr. T makes his feelings quite clear. We get the scoop from MTV:

Mr. T has a message for anyone who would ask him to cameo in the upcoming “A-Team” movie: “I pity the fool!”

“We don’t do cameos!” the pop-culture icon stated — or more accurately, screamed — when asked about the in-development movie based on the 1983-1987 show that made him famous. “You don’t disrespect us, or ‘Pow! Pow!’” he added, pumping his fists. “Do you know what I mean?”

As such, the 55-year-old action hero said he wouldn’t give the “A-Team” movie his blessing by appearing in one of the “father-figure” roles that have become de rigueur for remakes. “I ain’t got nothing against [producers Spike Seldin, Marc Silvestri, Alex Young and returning series creator Stephen J. Cannell] picking someone for the movie, but it’s insulting me to ask me to be in it [as someone else]. It’s just like my ex-girlfriend saying ‘Why don’t you come out to dinner with my new boyfriend?’ You see what I mean? I am not going to do that.”

Fucking right Mr.T.! Cameos in remakes are always shit, and if Mr.T is not going to be B.A. then he should not be in the film period. Especially if it is Mr.T. Mr.T cannot pretend to be anyone else but Mr.T, he is one of the most recognizable and unique individuals in all of history and it is impossible for him to do a little cameo, and it is insulting to even ask him. Mr.T is royalty as far as I am concerned, If I ever had the chance to meet him I would ask him to knight me. After being knighted by Mr.T I would have no problem calling myself Sir Douglas the rest of my days.

Mr.T. sold his gold after the horror of hurricane Katrina, and he beat cancer by punching it to death. He is on my list of people to meet before I die and I nod my hat that he is staying strong, and not doing some bullshit cameo. His analogy of dinner with an ex and her new boyfriend is classic, MTV got a great interview and that is a classic line. The only way they are going to get Mr.T. in the movie is if they put drugs in his milk and film him when he is unconscious.

Our good friends at FILMJUNK have posted a link to a new game that is offered to us from the makers of the upcoming film knocked up. It is a baby making game, you throw in 2 pictures of whoever you like and see what the baby outcome will be. It is a fun game and a great idea for an ad. Thank you FILMJUNK and the webmaster of lust for bringing this to our attention.

GO see the game here.

Before they’ve even had a chance to start counting their money… Pirates of the Caribbean 3 has already set a box office record. Pirates 3 is opening in more theaters than any other movie in history. Coming in with 4362 screens. That’s 110 screens more than Spider-Man 3 had. Crazy!

The folks over at Yahoo give us this:

Released by the Walt Disney Co., “Pirates of the Caribbean” now aims to snatch back the record for best debut it lost this month to “Spider-Man 3,” the Sony Corp. blockbuster that pulled in $151.1 million over opening weekend. That debut shattered last summer’s record of $135.6 million set by “Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest.”

The length of “At World’s End” — two hours, 47 minutes — will be a hurdle, limiting the number of screenings theaters can fit in each day. The movie runs about 15 minutes longer than “Dead Man’s Chest” and nearly half an hour longer than “Spider-Man 3.”

I haven’t seen the movie yet… but I can already tell you (and I’ve been saying this for months now) that Pirates 3 is too damn long. Oh well, we’re off to see it this afternoon so we’ll be talking about it on tonight LIVE Uncut show.

There aren’t a lot of TV shows that you can say “If they made that into a movie, it’s guaranteed to make lots of money”. Sex and the City would be one of those for sure. I swear, every woman I’ve ever talked to always lists that amongst their favorite shows. It’s almost like a religion for those with vaginas. Here’s a tip guys… if you’re on a date with a chick and you dig her and want her to go back to your place later…. talk about favorite shows and casually mention that you loved “Sex and the City”… even though you know most guys don’t. You’re so IN!

Anyway, there have been talks about a Sex and the City movie for a couple of years now. The big thing holding things up is that a couple of the cast members HATE each other. But I think I recall reading a little while ago that MONEY cures all wounds, and that the girls said they’d ultimately do it. Well… now they’ve got a director. Our friends over at Cinema Blend give us this:

Rumor has it that Michael Patrick King is set to direct a feature film version of the show. King, wrote and directed several episodes of the TV series as well serving as an executive producer during its run. He won an Emmy for his work on ‘Sex’, but he’s never done anything in movies till now. Sex and the City: The Movie will be his theatrical writing and directorial debut.

Word is that the cast itself hasn’t signed up yet officially… but you know that if the studio is already green-lighting development and hiring its director… they already feel assured that the girls will do it. Personally… I have no doubt they will… and that every guy on the planet will have to agree to take their dates to it if they ever hope to get laid again.

We have more video game news today and it is weird to say the least. It appears they are going to make a movie about the Sims, a game that allows you to live a life that you would like. We get the news from out friends at movieweb:

The game is now five years old, and is the best selling PC game in the history of the medium. It was only a matter of time before someone decided to overhaul its basic premise for the big screen.

Rob Humble did say, “‘The SIMS has done an interactive version of an old story, which is what it’s like to have infinite power and how do you deal with it. Given that that’s an old story, you can imagine how easily that would translate to traditional story telling.”

I do not know how they are going to do a movie on this. In the game from what I understand you just work on the life of your character, including all the mundane things like eating, working, sleeping and walking the dog. I do not see how a game like this could have a movie adaptation. I understand that the name may be good advertising, but the game itself is simply an open forum, the players pick their path.

I am not sure if this is going to be animated or live action, but I would expect them to use the same animation that is used in the game. If you are going to just follow a character around as they progress in their lived experience you might as well base the movie off of the game of LIFE board game. I do not get this one, but the game has been wildly popular and perhaps they are banking on he built in audience to fill the seats. We shall see.

Groundhog Day tops the list of so many movie fans favourite comedies. Its certainly near the top of mine. So when I heard the news of Disney buying the rights to a remake I was reminiscent of the classic Bill Murray movie, but nervous about the word remake. The good news is its not a remake. Not really.

Cinematical says:

But it’s been fourteen years since the original came out — don’t you think it’s time for a remake? No? Well good, because they’re not making one. However, they are taking the same exact concept and setting it in a high school — an attempt, I imagine, to convince a younger generation that this is a hip, fresh idea. Based on a pitch from first-time feature scribe Flint Wainess, Monday Monday has been picked up by Disney with Adam Shankman (Hairspray) and Jennifer Gibgot attached to produce through their Offspring Entertainment.

God this is such a BAD idea. The movie was perfect. It was never answered WHY this was happening to poor Bill or even Puxutawney Phil, and you didn’t need to know. This is one of those genius movies that needs to be left alone and just re-released in an anniversary edition on February Second.

Instead Groundhog Day Junior, despite not having a script or cast, is set to screen sometime next year.

:headdesk:

Looks like today is all about Star Wars. With Celebration IV upon us, Star Wars news is spilling out like a fatguy in a speedo. And it looks like the relaunch of the website is under way.

The Force.net reports:

Big news for fan filmmakers!
From the press release: Star Wars fans can connect with the Force in ways they’ve only imagined beginning Friday, May 25, when StarWars.com launches a completely redesigned website that empowers fans to mash-up their homemade videos with hundreds of scenes from Star Wars movies; watch hundreds of fan-made Star Wars videos; and interact with Star Wars enthusiasts from around the world like never before.

StarWars.com is also unveiling a new collection of hundreds of videos “ many never before seen on the Internet“ that will let fans enjoy some of the best user-generated Star Wars videos from across the web, including such cult favorites as Chad Vader, and five years worth of Star Wars Fan Movie Festival shorts, co-presented by AtomFilms.com

Now I know a certain Movie Blog Senior Editor that once starred in a Star wars fan film which was pretty impressively made. Perhaps it will finally find a home online for the populous to take in. (hint hint)

Of course I start to wonder if this sudden move to capture the youTube generation of filmmakers will take anything away from popular fan film hosts? These people have legitimately been providing the world of fanfilmmakers a home for their works. Will this leave them homeless when StarWars.com opens its doors to the masses?

Also,Make sure to check out Starwars.com on Sunday, May 27th at 11:30 am (Pacific) for a “MUST SEE SURPRISE”. This according to a blub on the main oage of Starwars.com. Any guesses?

Ok, I am a big kid. Fortunately I have kids so I can easily sweep my embarassing Toys’R'Us mentality away and keep my parents from forcing me into councelling.

Counting Down reports:

Star Wars PocketModel Trading Card Game revolutionizes the collectible trading card genre by bringing card games into the third dimension. The innovative PocketModels allow Star Wars fans to collect, build and customize Star Wars vehicles that are played in entertaining ways with cards featuring favorite characters, vehicles and scenes from the six-film Star Wars Saga.

Now we all know that Doug is a Magic the Gathering fan and John quietly geeks out with him while still retaining his adult status, so why not. (WizKids also produces a BattleStar Galactica trading card game)

Personally my gaming style has always been more of a tabletop dice and paper, or 3d combat games. So when WizKids announced their mini paper models combat game I secretly start crafting a way to acquire this folded 2D models of bliss without my wife killing me.

This looks like a lot of fun, but sadly I will likely just get them for the models.

I have all the faith in the world that when George Lucas says he wont do something, that likely means “I won’t until I change my mind”

TheForce.net

Steve Sansweet had debunked the future Star Wars movies on TV rumors that were sparked by an article on Foxnew.com (featuring an interview with George Lucas). I will admit, I took Sansweet at his word while others did not. They kept the faith in George and went with the theory that he had accidentally let something slip. Heck, I argued against that idea.

I have never wanted to be wrong more in my life. Cheers, to wishful thinking. There is supposed to be some sort fo big announcement at CIV tomorrow (May 25th) so keep your fingers crossed.

I love Lucas, warts and all. I owe him my soul for the Star Wars franchise. Which makes it hurt that much more when he does things that drive me crazy.

Its the ones closest to you that have the ability to hurt you the most.

But honestly if there is one thing you can count on from George Lucas is that he never keeps his word. He SWORE that Star Wars will never come out on DVD.

Then after the prequel trilogy did come out on dvd, he SWORE that the original Trilogy never would. They did.

Then he SWORE the original cuts of the Original Trilogy would never be released in any fashion. They did.

Now he swears that there will not be any more films EVER! Well to me that half says “I will let you know when we start working on them”

Now this big mystery announcement is not likely to be a feature film announcement, but rather the first “official” public announcement of the Animated series and the planned live action ongoing series. That would be my guess.

The North American release of Sunshine has a new release date, we get the update from the newsmasters at cinematical:

Cinematical was just informed (via a press release) that Danny Boyle’s Sunshine has had its release date pushed up to July 20; a move that put a huge smile on my face as we come to the end of a relatively tame Wednesday. For those slightly out of the loop on this one, Sunshine was originally supposed to be released this past March 16. And although the film arrived in theaters around the world (as planned) Fox Searchlight delayed its release here in the states, subsequently pushing it all the way back to December.

We talked about Sunshine a little while ago. It is the film where in the near future they have to re ignite the sun. For those of you that have seen the film what are your thoughts? For those of you that are in North America - here is the trailer to tide you over until July 20.

Looks like local newsies in New Haven have done some sleuthing and obtained some spoiler action. We get the heads up from cinemablend:

Indiana Jones 4 is currently in the midst of production, and they’re about to start shooting in New Haven, Connecticut. The town’s local newspaper, the New Haven Independent somehow got hold of a scene by scene breakdown of exactly what they’ll be shooting there. You’d think by now Lucas and Spielberg would be good enough at keeping spoilers under wraps to keep a few small town reporters out. But good for the New Haven Independent.

I do not want to divulge any of the discoveries. For those of you that want to be spoiler free, for your viewing of the film - I can appreciate that. For those of you that want to investigate the juicy goods I suggest reading the full dish via the New Haven Independent.

It is nuts that this information was leaked. It does not give away anything major but does seem to inform us of an entire scene in the film. For those of you that enjoy spoilers, this is a chance for you to celebrate.

It looks like Sacha Baron Cohen has begun filming his next project featuring the Bruno character. We get the fresh news from cinematical:

Is there any town in this country where its citizens are so out-of-touch and self-absorbed that they won’t recognize the comedic actor in uniform performing his usual shtick? Well, it seems there is such a place — Los Angeles. La La Land. Defamer reports (via a spy) that Cohen (as Bruno) and his ten-person crew were spotted at the Omni Hotel in downtown Los Angeles attending a luncheon hosted by the Foreign Trade Association. Yup, it appears Bruno is officially underway.

I am not very excited about posting this news, I will not lie to you. It will continue to get more difficult for Cohen to do his reactionary comedy when people are aware of who he is. But news is news, and it is my job to divulge the news to my international friends… and the good news is that the film is underway.

I am a fan of Cohen, enjoy all his characters, and I anxiously await the Bruno movie. Cohen portrays characters that bring about discrimination upon themselves in order to expose the underlying feelings of intolerance. By bringing intolerance out in the open we may mock it, deal with it and hopefully grow in both understanding and tolerance.

Sobering news coming from latinoreview about the new G.I. Joe script. We get the skinny from out friends at FILMJUNK and they provide us with the following commentary:

According to El Mayimbe of Latino Review, who managed to get his hands on the latest script for the G.I. Joe movie written by Skip Woods (Swordfish). I had previously heard that the movie would be about the early formation of Cobra, but what I didn’t expect to hear was that the movie doesn’t feature Cobra at all. Instead, the villain of the movie is a guy named… get this… “Cool Dude”. I don’t see how a name like that could possibly make it into the final draft of a script… maybe it’s just a placeholder, but seriously, what the hell? He works with The Baroness (who is some hot chick with a cobra tattoo on her back) to launch a nuclear missile into Hong Kong killing thousands of civilians. G.I. Joe investigates, and eventually tracks the attack to an inside man at the C.I.A., who goes on to become Cobra Commander at the very end of the movie. Did I mention that there is a love triangle between Scarlett, Duke and Action Man? LAME. This script sounds like a total disaster, and even if the Transformers ends up sucking, at least they maintained some semblance of the original characters and story. This is just bad news. What was wrong with the former G.I. Joe script written by David Elliot and Paul Lovett (Four Brothers) that received such high praise? Oh, I forgot… it didn’t involve Action Man.

This is horrible disgusting and infuriating news. I first heard of this debacle a few days ago by our good friend Phil Gee. I have no words to describe how I feel about this news. G.I. Joe is a cartoon that seems to scream for a live action adaptation. You have your heroes, you have your villains, people love the characters all you have to do is come up with the war. I hope the horrible internet buzz will cause them to reconsider the first script, create a new script or just scrap the project all together. Not since Kevin Smith talked about Tim Burton’s plans for Superman have I felt so clusterfucked by the bastardization of the original source material.

Seriously and earnestly, what the fuck is going on. I echo the thoughts of FILMJUNK and really am at a loss to why they would fuck with the original and beloved characters. Destro, Cobra Commander, Major Blood, Duke, Lady J, Roadblock, Storm Shadow, Snake Eyes, Zartan yadda, yadda, yadda what other characters do you need?

Tell your friends, turn plowshares into swords, sign petitions and riot in the streets. If they do a hatchet job on G.I. Joe someone will have to be drowned in a bathtub full of eagle piss.

The threat of the global warming apocalypse is going to be reinterated with a sequel to An Inconvenient Truth. We get the news from our friends at JoBlo:

IESB (still going strong despite Paramount’s best efforts) recently got to talk to director Davis Guggenheim at the premiere of his next film GRACIE and Guggenheim mentioned he’s in talks with the studio for a prequel. “I’m meeting with Paramount next week to talk about a sequel to INCONVENIENT TRUTH. Too early to talk about details.”

No matter what your stand is on global warming one thing is certain - humans are a destructive force when it comes to the world around them. We pump the air, water, and land full of all sorts of shit and hope that it will disappear into a pocket dimension. We need to change the way we live and start addressing the most real and destructive force on the planet today - exploding human population.

I am not certain we need a sequel to An Inconvenient Truth. Sure we could use another documentary on environmental issues, but I am skeptical that a sequel will add to the message of the first film. Will Al Gore be a central figure in this one as well or will they follow another central figure in the debate? If they need a new speaker in this film, I vote for David Suzuki.

The Weinstein Company is pleased to announce that they have formed a strategic alliance with Exodus Film Group to jointly develop, produce and finance a multi-picture slate of CG-animated feature films, DVDs, and television series. TWC will distribute the titles worldwide. The joint announcement was made today by Harvey Weinstein, Co- Chairman of The Weinstein Company and John D. Eraklis, CEO of
TWC is handling worldwide distribution for Exodus’ much-anticipated CG- animated film Igor, which is set for a wide theatrical release on October 24, 2008.

Igor is a playfully irreverent comedy that brings a new twist to the classic monster genre. It tells the story of an evil scientist’s hunch backed lab assistant with big dreams of becoming a scientist himself and winning the annual Evil Science Fair. The stellar voice cast includes Jeremy Piven, Jay Leno, John Cusack, Jennifer Coolidge, Arsenio Hall, Molly Shannon, Steve Buscemi, John Cleese, Sean Hayes and Christian Slater. Award-winning animation writer, Tony Leondis, is directing the screenplay by Chris McKenna.

A children’s movie from the perspective of a monster, that sounds strikingly similar to another movie franchise that has made an outlandish amount of money. When you want a formula for printing money, you might as well copy one that has already worked.

I am surprised just how much money children’s films make. I guess it makes sense, when you target ads to kids - they get the parents out to the theatre like nothing else will. Nag factor for the win.

I have no problem with animated films, I simply find most of them to be horrible these days. The disney films of yesteryear were great, dare I say magical. The glut of 3-D animated trash that is now being pumped out of the shit house is concerning. Not that I expect anything to change, with horrible films making insane amounts of money the quality of the story becomes a mute issue for the people selling the product.

I am also tiring of celebrity voice actors. I do not want to notice a celebrities voice when I watch a cartoon - i want to be immersed in the world. Talented voice actors are artists - please give them a venue to work their magic.

In recent history we discussed the upcoming film Daybreakers, we learn today that Sam Neil will be joining the cast. We get the scoop from the movieweb:

Sam Neill has joined Ethan Hawke in Lionsgate’s upcoming vampire thriller Daybreakers, which is set to begin filming in Australia in July, according to Screen Daily.The story takes place in 2017 as of a clandestine group of vampires discovers the key to saving the human race from a plague.

Sam Neil is a dude that I am always glad to see in films. His acting in In The Mouth Of Madness was wicked and he always brings the goods no matter what role he gets. Daybreakers is starting to shore up a decent cast, I wonder if this film is going to pull an Iron Man and keep surprising us with ongoing good news. I hope so, I am always game for a kick ass vampire flick.

The mother of all marathons kicked off Celebration 4, all six films were shown in order. We get the skinny on celebration from Monsters And Critics:

At the start of what organizers billed as the biggest Star Wars party ever, thousands of sci-fi fans invaded the Los Angeles Convention Centre Wednesday for the first-ever consecutive US screening of all six Star Wars films. The 17-hour marathon was the opening event for the five-day official 30th anniversary Star Wars convention, which is expected to draw 35,000 fans.

‘It’s quite simply the biggest and best Star Wars event ever,’ said Steve Sansweet, the head of fan relations for Lucasfilm.

This Star Wars celebration looks to be huge. For those of you that are interested, movie blog reader and master of photography Simon will be doing a photo blog of the event and updates can be found here: I have never been to a convention like this but I do plan on going in the near future. They fascinate me on may levels, but mostly because I am a sci fi geek. My dream is to buy a set of storm trooper and/or Vader outfit before I die. There is a good chance once I get the armor, I will wear it for a week straight.

If anyone of you are at the celebration please keep us up to date with your news, updates and pictures.

Looks like the horned one is cleaning up on the rental market. We get the news from the caves of yahoo:

The film, an Oscar winner for art direction, cinematography and makeup, topped the Nielsen VideoScan First Alert sales chart and Home Media Magazine’s rental chart for the week ending May 20, scoring a double whammy for New Line Home Entertainment.

“Labyrinth,” which earned $37.5 million in theaters, handily beat another new release with a significantly bigger boxoffice take, Sony Pictures’ “Stomp the Yard,” a musical drama that grossed $61.4 million. “Stomp” debuted at No. 2 on the sales chart but mustered only an eighth-place finish on the rental chart with earnings of $4 million, compared with $6.5 million for “Pan’s Labyrinth.”

Pan’s Labyrinth was downright fucking amazing. It was a beautiful story that perfectly weaved fairy tale with real life drama in order to present us a delightful tale of the power of human imagination in order to overcome immeasurable horror.

I am not surprised that this movie is doing so well. This film has legs and could become a word of mouth rental juggernaut. I love fantasy films because you can make up the most fantastic of worlds and marvelous of creatures. Not only is Pan’s Labyrinth a glorious fantasy film, but once again pays tribute to the human ability of imagination. If you have not seen this film - rent it.

By the hanging sleeve of the wizard! Borat is releasing a 2 in 1 travel guide, we get the scoop from the caves of yahoo:

Fictional Kazakh television reporter Borat Sagdiyev, who made movie audiences around the world laugh and cringe as he toured the United States, is going into print with a book of travel advice. Borat, the creation of British comedian Sacha Baron Cohen, has signed a book deal with Flying Dolphin Press, an imprint of Random House Inc.’s Doubleday Broadway Publishing Group.

Suzanne Herz, publisher of Flying Dolphin Press, said it will be two books in one — one half a guide to the United States for Kazakhs and the other half a guide to Kazakhstan for Westerners. The book, to be released in hardcover, will have a dual title: “Borat: Touristic Guidings To Minor Nation of U.S. and A.” and “Borat: Touristic Guidings To Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan.”

This should be hilarious, I think in time people will get tired of Borat, but now is the perfect time to release this book. I do not think people will get sick of Borat because of the work of Cohen, but much like all popular character movies the quotes from the film are beat to death by everyone until everyone is sick of them. In fact In the Borat film this is made apparent when the comedy coach says “not” that was made famous though the characters Wayne and Garth of Wayne’s world.

I think it is safe to say that they will be able to get away with murder in the book. I cannot wait to read Borat’s guide to both American and Kazakh prostitutes. This is jut great fun and will most likely end up on my coffee table upon release.

Holy crap. I woke up this morning to about 15 emails from people all sending me this new International Transformers Poster. I’m not all that impressed by it personally… but is it just me or does Megatron in this picture actually look like… you know… Megatron?

It looks like real life violence is causing Mexican love for drug lord films to wane, we get the story from the caves of yahoo:

Once popular B-movies idolizing violent drug lords are dying out in Mexico as the horror of a real-life cartel war strips the genre of its glamour.

Mexican actor and director Rumaldo Bucio, famed for portraying trigger-happy villains in home-grown films such as “Narcos of Death” said growing disgust at increasingly violent traffickers had forced him to stop making films about them. “Drug traffickers were seen as gods; they were idolized,” said Bucio, better known by his stage name Agustin Bernal. “Not any more, people are shunning all this in movies and real life.”

I can see how this could happen. If I lived in a war torn country there is a pretty good chance I would not want to watch war drama for recreation…because I can go outside for that. Timing is everything, and if you release something that is too raw or real for people it stops becoming entertainment and starts becoming a painful reminder.

Most people watch films for recreation, and that means you want to enjoy yourself. If your entertainment causes you misery you certainly do not feel like you got your money’s worth. Films on occasion are meant to push our buttons and cause us to think about the issues, but when the issues are already around you - It may be too much of the same, it may be too much to bear.

Reviews are flooding in all over for Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End and the critics are conflicted. Some love it, some hate it.

Rotten Tomatoes currently has it at a wavy 52% nearly splitting the decision one way or the other.

Some of the things being said:
Michael Wilmington, Chicago Tribune:

The most visually spectacular, action-packed and surreal of the adventures of Capt. Jack Sparrow.

Peter Travers, Rolling Stone:

Producer Jerry Bruckheimer does deserve a shoutout: It takes a kind of genius to sucker audiences into repeatedly buying the same party tricks.

Michael Rechtshaffen, Hollywood Reporter:

More than ever, Depp masterfully keeps the enterprise afloat, even when the sheer weight of all those other characters threatens to throw it off-course.

Owen Gleiberman, Entertainment Weekly:

Just about every character in At World’s End comes with his or her own agenda, and the movie grows top-heavy as we attempt to keep track of who’s trying to accomplish what.

I have my ticket for a Sunday Night show already, so I won’t be boarding this one just yet, but I don’t know if I should be excited or not.

I like this idea for a Disney movie. They take the most classic Disney Princess archetype and thrust her out of her animated fairytale world and into ours. With some charming results.

SlashFilm calls it:

In an animated fairy tale world, a young girl meets and falls in love with the handsome prince of her dreams. News of this romance upsets the prince’s mother, the evil queen, who uses her black magic to send the girl hurtling out of the animated world into the one place in the universe where there is no true love: modern day Manhattan. The now-real girl has to survive in New York City and find her way home again to her true love. Amy Adams, Patrick Dempsey, James Marsden and Susan Sarandon star.

Now call me sappy, but I just LOVe this kind of stuff. Sure its enough to put you into sugar shock but just from this trailer alone I am actually looking forward to this. It will be a good movie I can take my kids to and looks witty enough for me to enjoy it too.

The wicked witch embodies the very look and feel of the typical Disney Evil Witch. This just blends just enough of the Disney sweetness, live action charm and edgy parody that mixed with very little toil and trouble to make the perfect family film.

Click Here to go watch the trailer.

Here you go kids! More pinko propaganda from Michael Moore.

It looks like Orlando Bloom will be taking a sabbatical after Pirates 3 and return to the theater for thespian delights! We get the news from the caves of Yahoo:

Orlando Bloom plans to hang up his sword after spending nearly a decade making the blockbuster trilogies “Pirates of the Caribbean” and “The Lord of the Rings” to tread the boards of a London theater this summer. Bloom, 30, begins rehearsals in June for “Celebration” by British playwright David Storey. The play will open in July.

“I just need to do this,” Bloom said in an interview last week. “I wanted to feel like going back to basics in a sense and having just a completely different experience.”

Bloom had intended to go onto the stage after graduating from the Guildhall School of Music and Drama in Britain, but instead ended up on the big screen in a series of blockbuster sword-and-sandal films, starting with “The Lord of the Rings” trilogy, which began production in 1999.

We have said for some time that Bloom should hit the bricks and get back to the basics… we are glad he has been listening. He was good in Lord Of The Rings but it is safe to say that most have not been thrilled with his other performances. The good news is that he should have enough money to retire if he likes.

Bloom however is not ready to throw in the towel and I respect and admire his desire to go back to the farm leagues and slug it out on stage. It shows a desire to learn, to progress and return to the womb of his love that is acting. If he has enough cash in his coffers he may do well to stay in the theater and leave the movie shows to other up and comers looking to make their break on celluloid.

This is the best move for him at the present. Retire or continue in film, the theater will do him well in either case. The theater is the factory in which the strongest acting is forged.

Here is the new trailer kiddies! In this one we hear the fish for the first time as the silver surfer. Campea hates his voice, I think it is alright but think he would of been a better fit for Galactus, what do you guys think about the voice work and the trailer itself?

The beloved and talented Christopher Lee will no longer be gracing the screen of Sweeny Todd. We get the news of the slash from movieweb:

It’s a shame. Christopher Lee has been axed out of Tim Burton’s upcoming musical Sweeney Todd. According to Playbill, so have a number of other characters. Oh, well. At least Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter are still in it.

It was DreamWorks that confirmed Lee’s “Gentleman Ghost” was removed from the film. The character had been raising some eyebrows, since the ghost does not appear anywhere in the stage version of the story. Lee explained, “It would have been worse if I had done the scenes, but I never got to film them. It’s a shame as the lyrics were wonderful, but these things happen.”

It sucks that this happened to Lee. I remember how bummed out he was when he had his scenes cut from Return Of The King. He is a fantastic actor and I would love to see him in more sword and sorcery roles. He looks majestic with long hair and a massive beard. When I grow into elderhood I hope I look as badass as he did in that film. When I turn 60 I plan on stop getting haircuts and rock the full blown wizard look.

International Friends: Who has the greatest on screen wizard look?

Ladies and Gentlemen I bring you the first remake news of the day. It appears Mike Meyers will be starting in the retelling of The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, we get the skinny from latinoreview:

Mike Myers is attached to star in “The Secret Life of Walter Mitty,” a remake of the Danny Kaye comedy classic that producer Samuel Goldwyn Jr. has moved from Paramount to 20th Century Fox, reports Variety. Jay Kogen, a writer and producer on “The Simpsons,” “Frasier” and, most recently, CBS’ “The Class,” is penning the script.

Jim Carrey had once been attached to play the daydreamer first brought to life in 1947 by Kaye in a pic based on a short story by James Thurber. Directors attached to the project on and off during the past few years include Steven Spielberg and Ron Howard. When those efforts didn’t pan out, Goldwyn moved the film to Par, where “Mean Girls” director Mark Waters tried to do it with Owen Wilson.

I have not seen the original film but I may soon. With so many remakes around these days I may start a column that compares the remake to the original and then debate and discuss. This may bring some amount of joy to watching so many of them.

More than Mike Meyers, my greatest hope for this film lies with Jay Kogen. As a producer/writer for the Simpsons and Frasier I personally have hope for his abilities as a story teller. Frasier is a TV show that may or may not be your cup of tea, but it is one of the best written TV shows ever and even those that dislike it will agree to that.

Darren Conley should be writing about this. International friends the majestic television show known as Gilmore Girls may be getting its own made for TV movie. We get the news from the moviehole:

TV Guide reports that the “Gilmore Girls” mightn’t be seen in more than just middle-of-the-day repeats in a couple of years. According to my pal Michael Ausiello, a two-hour telemovie may be on the cards.

Amy-Sherman Palladino, head honcho on the show, told the site, “in the next year or two, she hopes to make — wait for it — a two-hour Gilmore Girls TV-movie that ties up all those loose threads”.

The one chickie that sounds less than enthused about it is star Alexis Bledel. “That’s certainly not something I had thought of doing”, Bledel tells Ausiello. “That’s really funny, I have no idea how I would feel in a few years. I don’t know, I’m sure the script Amy would write would be great, but I guess I’d have to read it and see how I felt at the time.”

I was trying to wait and see if I could get an email response from Darren on this issue, but alas, he is busy educating strangers in the way of words. The linguist’s work is never done. Personally I am not interested in this project at all. I would however love to sit beside the Conley’s as they watch it, I have yet to see a person love the Gilmore Girls more than Darren and I think just watching him bask in the glory of the movie would entertain me greatly.

For those of you that do like the show I hope this fulfills your wildest dreams!

We may have the mother of all car chase films on our hands. Today we learn of a film that has 100 pages of the script dedicated to the chase, we get the scoop from our friends at JoBlo:

McTiernan is looking to make a comeback with his bread and butter - the action-thriller. He’s set to direct Karl Urban in the low-budget flick RUN, which features a 100-page car chase in its script. Now if you use the old conversion chart that says one script page equals one minute of footage, that’s a 100-minute car chase (by comparison, PREDATOR was only 107 minutes). There is a plot but with a 100-page car chase, do you really care? Filming is set to begin on RUN this August.

I like car chase scenes if they are done well. They require a lot of action to stay interesting and the hilly streets on San Francisco are usually a good place to get that. My favorite car chase scenes are in the Blues Brothers. I get great joy when police cars are piled up 20 feet high, cars are driven through a mall and gay Nazis plummet to their death. This is fuel driven action!

Die Hard and Predator are legendary action films. I hope McTiernan is able to bring that level of awesome to this project. To have predator level awesome in a car chase movie would certainly make it a glorious experience. By the sounds of it the whole movie may take place in the car, Run indeed.

I assumed Eric Idle and John Cleese were aware that Shrek 3 was using their coconut joke because they were in the film. It appears they were not informed or asked. We get this interesting story from Pink Is The New Blog via Cinematical

Monty Python legend and star of the new Shrek the Third was in toronto over the long weekend to promote his new play/musical “Not The Messiah”. He took some time to talk to Mad Dog & Billie on Toronto’s 99.9 MIX FM where he dished out some juicy goods: “I’ve always loved Toronto cuz we kicked off our world tour here in 1974 when we came as Python so there’s a great openness and a willingness to see something new … So many people love the coconut gag from Monty Python — it’s of course a radio joke and its been stolen patently by Shrek 3 I’m happy to say — So we’ll be able to sue their asses!” to which the MIX FM reporter said “GO ON …”

Eric: “No, I mean it’s like there it is in the first 30 seconds — you go — wait a minute, John [Cleese] and I are in this film and you steal our joke? Um, I don’t know how the others are going to take to this … I hope they (Dreamworks) cleared it with them — and they also steal from Spamalot, you know …

MIX FM: “Don’t you think they did that to pay homage to you?”

Eric: “Do you think if I stole your wallet that’d be homage to your money? — you see they neglected to tell us — so the first I saw it was in the premiere — and I was SHOCKED — my whole family went WHAT! How dare you! So I walked out — calmed down — and walked back in — but I was shocked and I think if you steal peoples jokes, I don’t think that’s homage, I think that’s theft.

I will have to side with Idle on this one. The guys were in the film and if you are going to use something from a Python sketch the least you could do is ask. If you take someones joke or parody someones joke without asking them, it is stealing - end of story.

I understand the Shrek movie is a parody of other fairy tales and things like this, but as long as the authors of original material are alive you should ask them if you can use their material for parody. It is common courtesy, it is prudent and it is right. There is one man who walks the earth who does parody like no other - his name is Weird Al Yankovic and he always asks permission, when people refuse, he does not parody their work. He is a gentleman.

All this being said I have a bias. I am a comedian and have no love for joke thieves and will never defend them. I also think spoof movies are the lowest common denominator in the history of cinema. I would rather watch 12 hyenas rape 5 underage gazelles than sit through another fucking spoof movie. They all steal and don’t even do it well, they are pure unfiltered shit (with a select few exceptions).

At the end of the day I side with Idle and yet I also hold him accountable. Why would you be part of a spoof movie if you have problems with thieves? I am certain the dudes at Shrek threw in the gag as an homage to the guys that were in the film and although they should of asked, they may have had good intentions and meant it as a surprise for them. It is hard to have a case when you were paid to be in the film but I can empathize with Idle’s discontent.

Moral of the story is: if you work with thieves, you lose things.

This could be the best movie news of the year. It appears Danny Glover will be Directing a film that will be funded partially by Hugo Chavez and the people of Venezuela! We get the revolutionary news from cinematical:

The radical leader, along with the Venezuelan congress and the new government-funded studio Villa del Cine, brought in Lethal Weapon star Danny Glover to direct his biopic on Toussaint Louverture, the Latin American icon who led the 1791 Haitian slave revolt, which kicked off the former French colony’s revolution and subsequent independence. Glover actually announced the project at Cannes last year, but at that time he was planning to shoot in South Africa. Now that Chávez has become involved, Glover is receiving a budget of about $18 million, co-financed by Venezuela and Argentina, and the production has moved to Caracas. The film should be a monumental boost for Venezuelan cinema, which has finally been growing in notice thanks to 2005’s Secuestro Express.

Hugo Chavez is probably one of my favorite political figures of all time. The guy may be a hothead, fly off the handle and say questionable comments in inappropriate places but at the bottom of it all, there is a man that came from poverty and has a desire to make his country better for all of its people. If you have not seen his Barbara Walters interview, treat yourself and watch it.

The movie itself sounds great. This sounds like a quality historical drama that has life lessons that will ring true today as they did in yesteryear. Danny Glover seems to be passionate about the project and in my opinion that is always key to movie magic.

It will be interesting to see if the trend of government sponsored films continues. I don’t know how to feel about a government gambling money on cinema, but then again it does employ and build an industry within the country. In the long run the films could certainly make money. One thing is certain however - I cannot wait to see this.

Kurt Russell joins the Grindhouse discussion today and he is not excited about the film being split. We get the following Russell quote from IMDB:

Kurt Russell, who starred in the Death Proof segment of the Quentin Tarantino/Robert Rodriguez horror “double feature” Grindhouse, has expressed disappointment over the decision to release Death Proof as a separate feature for European audiences. Appearing today (Tuesday) at a news conference at the Cannes Film Festival, where Death Proof is screening in competition for the Palme d’Or, Russell, acknowledging that he hasn’t seen the reedited longer version, said, “I’m disappointed for any audience that they won’t get the Grindhouse experience. … These [two] movies are going to go out there by themselves and they’ll live their own life, but my prediction is that 20 years from now, you’ll want the Grindhouse experience.

I agree with Kurt. Even though Death Proof was not a movie that I enjoyed I think the film should remain the way it was. It was a fantastic movie going experience and it is sad that many will not be able to experience that. I think that in due time a DVD of Grindhouse will emerge that will have the film in the original Grindhouse format, and I think it will be available within the next 5 years.

I really disliked Death Proof but I know a group of people that enjoyed it greatly. I am hoping that when it is released as a stand alone film there is more Kurt less talk. That being said I am not sure that making any of the individual parts better is worth splitting up the entity known as Grindhouse.